Why do I get defensive even when I know my partner isn't attacking me?

### How do I tell the difference between healthy boundaries and defensiveness?

How do I tell the difference between healthy boundaries and defensiveness?

### Can both partners work on defensiveness at the same time, or does one person need to go first?

Defensiveness in Couples: A Body-Level Read - The Anger Practice

*When your partner says something innocuous and your chest tightens before you even know why, you're witnessing the body's early-warning system for relational threat. Defensiveness begins below the neck, in breath and muscle, long before it reaches your mouth. Here's how to read